Wednesday, October 21, 2009

My 25 Things...

I recently read a post where the author had listed 25 things that she wanted to do. I pondered making a list and came to the conclusion that is was a great idea. Having a concrete focus would probably help me stay organized, so here we go...

1. Have and keep a daily Bible study and prayer time.

2. Exercise DAILY!!!

3. Create and stick to a daily reading routine with my boys.

4. Organize all of my household paperwork and continue to stay on top of it so it never gets out of control again.

5. Have a daily household cleaning routine. Create it, do it, stick to it!

6. Look for and implement more ways to be be more financially conservative.

7. Complete my Special Education Masters.

8. Have more fun with my kids.

9. Try to find one new activity or place to visit once a month.

10. Find a church that all of my family members enjoy and go weekly.

11. Get baptised.

12. Read more books for pleasure.

13. Keep in better touch with friends and family.

14. Do one kind act for someone every day.

15. Research and implement a healthy diet for my family.

16. Encourage my husband to follow a healthy diet and exercise daily.

17. Research and visit new states to find a great place to raise my boys.

18. Be patient, always...

19. Buy an investment property.

20. Paint the boys' bathroom.

21. Be an encouraging and loving wife and mother at all times.

22. Attend a weekly Bible study.

23. Share my faith openly without fear of judgement or backlash.

24. Have a daily Bible study time with my husband.

25. Get back to my oil painting...

Monday, October 19, 2009

He answered!!!

So life has been a bit of a struggle lately...first my husband had huge problems at work due to some untruthful people. We thought he was going to loose his job. Next, I received a letter from the IRS saying we were being audited. The day I was to share the news of our audit, our sewer backs up into our home, which is my place of business. A days wages lost and a completely stressed out husband, but we survived. I prayed a lot that day...I have been praying a lot every day, leaning on the Lord's strength to get me through. And He has been faithful. That is the only way I have been able to bear the stresses we have endured lately.

Well, after the audit we were sure that HAD to be it...nope not quite. I received a phone call that my 24 year old niece has cancer and would be undergoing Chemotherapy. Ok, we can handle this, I again turn to God. I know He is there. I feel Him near. I sense His spiritual arms wrapped around me holding me tight. It will all be ok. "Look for the lessons here, Kim." Learn what I am attempting to teach you. I am preparing you for something else. Look, listen, and learn." So I continue on, attempting to "Look, Listen, and Learn."

Alright, so my niece is getting the best possible treatment and her prognosis is great! Aaahh, great the next week when it rains and all of a sudden I realize it is raining in my house and the ceiling is sagging, I look up to the Lord and start singing the song "Flood" by Jars of Clay in the most joyful voice I have ever had. Really, what else was there to do? He is there...He has continued to be there and He will continue to be there for me and all of his children. I looked, as He asked me to, around at the water that was seeping into my hardwood floors. I listened, as He had requested, to the sound of the rain dripping in my living room. And I learned on that very day to sing. I sang because it will all be fine. I have faith that I will not allow to falter. I have strength given to me by my Heavenly Father. Anything and All things are possible through HIM. I feel so blessed to have God on my side.

So when I lost 2 clients and over 50% of my income over the last two weeks I didn't panic. I called on the only one who could help me. I prayed for Him to show me what He wished for me to do. Is it time to attempt to go back to a more traditional type job or to continue working from my home and be a part of ever aspect of my two little boys lives? I asked for guidance and praised God for his love, mercy, and grace. Then I began to be active in a pursuit of more clients and to also find a more traditional job. I have continued to pray and tonight I think I got my answer. Today it appears that I have 2 new clients. The hours are a bit shorter, which means the income is a little less, but it will get me through until a time when either the Lord sends someone else into my life or until the times when He shares with me that it is time to move on.

I can not even express how different my life is today. It is amazing because I have an incredible sense of peace. I know the Lord has a plan for me. A good plan...not one of harm, only of good. The experiences that I have had recently all have a purpose, one that I may not clearly understanding right now. They have been difficult, but I feel blessed to be experiencing them because I know that God is using these experiences to prepare me for something.

Dear Lord,
Thank you for having such an incredible plan for my life. It awes me and amazes me that You made me for a specific purpose. I also want to thank you for teaching me how to Look, Listen, and Learn. What an incredible opportunity you have given me! I am sorry that I often fall short, but I am thankful for your grace. Thank you for the challenges and struggles you have given me, as I now know they are only opportunities to grow. I will continue to draw near to you Lord and I thank you for always being here for me. In Jesus' name I pray...Amen.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Sometimes things are hard to understand...

My husband just called me. He was very somber in his tone and said he had some news he needed to share. A mutual friend of ours had sent him an email this morning. She just lost her mother to esophageal cancer 3 weeks ago. This has been an incredible loss in her life as her mother was her best friend. Now this morning she just shared that she found out 2 weeks ago that she has breast cancer herself. She is a wreck and my husband and I were stunned by this news. She is 34 years old and has a 15 year old son. After I hung up with him, I have been sitting here, feeling like I have been run over by an emotional bus. You see cancer is something that has been affecting many people in our lives. My niece was diagnosed with uterine cancer on Tuesday. She is 24. My husband's best friend is 37 years old and was diagnosed with a GBM IV, a terminal brain tumor, 10 months ago. My cousin's husband had a tumor removed from his brain stem almost a year ago and is still recovering from all of the trauma the surgery imposed. As I sit here thinking about all of the people I know with cancer, I wonder, why is this happening? Will I be next? I am terrified, but then I remember, I am not alone. Even if something such as this does occur, I have God. In the most difficult times in my life, He carries me and is always next to me. I just have to seek Him with an open and honest heart.

As I sit here and try to make sense of all of this tragedy in people's lives, I realize that is not for me to do. I can ask why, but I am not going to receive an answer. I just need to trust in God, in his plan for us all. Maybe it seems easy for me to say this because I have not been directly affected, but there is a reason that each of these situations is occurring. Tragedy tends to bring God's people closer to Him. While I would never would never wish hardship or tragic experiences on anyone, I do believe they happen for a purpose, the purpose of the greater good, God's greater good.

While I pray for those affected and their loved ones, I also pray for others I do not know. People all over the world as currently dealing with a variety of circumstances, many of them difficult ones. I hope and pray that with each and every difficult situation that you face, you know that God is with you...just seek Him, ask for His comfort. He will provide. He always does. He never fails.

Thank you Lord for giving me comfort during these very uncertain times. I know each difficult circumstance that I experience happens for a reason. Please help me to always find my comfort in Your arms and in Your Word. I pray that all of those currently affected by tragedy will seek You and Your guidance. Thank you for loving us all unconditionally. I praise you Lord. I thank You for all of the blessing You bestowed upon my life. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.